The Surprising Reasons Why Divorce Can Actually Be A Good Thing3 min read
There’s no denying that divorce can be an emotionally challenging time for any couple or family. Tensions are high, and there are many questions that will need to be answered about what comes next. However, you can take comfort in this: divorce, despite what many people say and believe about it, is actually a good thing.
Robert T of Modern Family Law says:
“Divorce means something different to everyone that goes through it. Some feel like it’s the end, while others believe it’s a new beginning. It’s essential to remember that the more conflict one has in their divorce, the more time and money it will require to resolve. Without conflict, a divorce can be up to 40% less expensive than those with conflict. Perspective matters in these emotional moments.”
What Divorce Really Means For You
Divorce can be stressful and may seem like a terrifying proposition, but you’re certainly not alone. Researchers say marriages have about a 50% chance of ending in divorce. However, that statistic is actually a positive; it means that fewer people are staying in bad and potentially dangerous marriages. Rather than continuing to remain in what may be a secure but negative situation, people are instead choosing to leave their marriages in search of better things.
Often, people will stay in their situation due to the security of marriage, whether that’s because of finances, family, or even just personal emotional security. However, leaving a bad marriage gives you the opportunity to grow. You may find new experiences and opportunities after leaving a bad marriage that you wouldn’t have otherwise been able to access. Leaving a harmful marriage that may secretly be holding you back can contribute to your own personal growth and wellbeing.
Donald Eby of Robinson & Henry, P.C. says:
“Many Coloradians do not understand that the Family Law courts are empowered to ensure that assets are fairly distributed, provide for the financial well-being of the less financially secure spouse, and look out for the best interests of any children.
Anyone in a divorce situation should take this legal action seriously because the agreements reached or Orders issued are enforceable and going back to the court to correct or change these benefits or obligations is quickly or easily modified once one party determines that he or she should get more.”
What Divorce Means For Your Kids
When kids are involved, seeking a divorce can be even more stressful. Especially when custody issues are at play — children will spend 277 days out of the year with the custodial parent in most divorce cases. However, there are many indicators and studies that show that divorce is actually good for children as well. Children of a bad marriage are often highly aware of the issues of their parents, regardless of how careful the parents are to hide the problems going on behind the scenes. Divorce can give children a deeper sense of security and comfort, knowing that both of their parents are happier.
If you’re considering divorce, know that you are not alone, and often divorce can result in you and your former spouse being happier than if you were to stay together in a bad marriage. Divorce may be incredibly stressful in the interim, but the long-term benefits typically outweigh the temporary emotional struggles.
Todd Burnham, founding partner at Burnham Law, says:
“With the right mindset, and emotionally intelligent legal representation, divorce is an opportunity to alter the course of your life. Our clients regularly report back, years later, that divorcing their spouse was the catalyst for growth in their lives. Children see the struggle and, if dysfunction is the norm, they repeat the dysfunction in their relationships. It takes courage to make changes that affect a family in the short term while having a long term goal. My hope is that people view divorce as both a “bottom” and a light at the end of a tunnel, leading to a new vision for what their lives and their children’s lives can be. Getting past that initial fear, and seeing that new vision for themselves, is where the rubber meets the road.”